it’s close to midnight and i am drowning in bed
floundering under blankets, my limbs filled with lead

i’ve been here for hours, my misery confined:
a thousand black waves that crash late in my mind

my thoughts turn to you and i start to sink
deeper and deeper through waters i drink

the liquid tastes bitter, but i relish the salt
relish the pain rushing in through my faults

i relish the tears that soak into my face
relish the nights that leave any trace

i know, i know, that i should be grateful
but how can i try when the thought is so painful

that living on land wouldn't change anything
that still to my skin the algae would cling

it’s awful down here in the black, cold and bleak
but with water all around, you don’t notice your leaks

i want to leave, but know only the ocean
know only the water’s predictable motion

when i try to swim, i am stopped every time
by the fear that lurks behind every rhyme

“what if i’m different when i reach the shore?
what if i’m, well, not me anymore?”

the sting of the salt erodes my skin
i’ll never escape this ocean i’m in.