I’d long since grown weary of trespassers. The casual forest nymph is tolerable, an occasional gnome can be ignored. But any humans that set foot in my realm, be it due to ignorance or happenstance, would not be treated so mercifully.
I spied on the hikers for quite some time, from the trees along the highway as my ravens flew overhead. I watched when the rack atop their glimmering new vehicle broke loose, causing a good portion of their supplies and food to fly into oblivion. The two set up camp in my woods, and began to thoroughly enjoy themselves, littering my soil with grimy plastics and smoldering cigarette ends. I glowered from the bushes as their tent came crumbling down in the middle of the night, forcing the two lovebirds to sleep in the great outdoors with sticks in their backs and a chill in their bones. And finally, I followed them as they took a romantic nighttime stroll in my murky coastal woods. To their horror (and to my absolute delight), Haley and Josh became hopelessly, unmistakably lost.
But such minor setbacks should never hold back a truly motivated hiker. The two of them powered on through my thorny brush, piercing winds and angular, slicing branches. And with each self-assured step the clueless lovers took, they strayed further, and further still, from the safety of their sad little campsite.
* * * * *
The scent of perfectly crisped pheasant and cloud-like lemon cakes wafted throughout the heavy trees, twisting and turning amidst the forest air until it reached the noses of Haley and Josh. “I can smell food!” shrieked Haley, grasping at her partner's arm.
“Oh my god that's awesome!” Josh shouted, already stumbling towards the origin of the entrancing smell, which had now morphed into that of freshly cut bread and warm spiced wine. “We must be near another campsite!”
And just as a fly is attracted to molten gold honey, Josh and Haley crashed through my trees, headed right for my trap.
The two humans broke through the branches into a clearing, their clothes a shredded, muddy mess. Their hungry eyes gaped at the scene before them. Atop the flowering grass lay a feast; tables strewn across the glade, packed to the brim with exotic meats and pastries; glasses of bubbling champagne glinted in the sunlight and decadent cakes beckoned, drizzled in chocolate and caramel sauces.
The gluttonous mortals threw aside their belongings and flew towards the food, shoveling their faces with one magnificent mouthful after another.
And as they gorged themselves on duck fat dumplings and guzzled down foaming ales, Josh and Haley’s doom crept ever so quietly closer. Ivy tendrils slithered their way along the grass, curling itself around their filthy boots. The more the humans ate, the stronger the vines grew. Thorns blossomed from the slimy leaves as the ivy spiraled its way up their ankles.
And just as the two of them reached for a golden raspberry pie, my vines heaved. Human screams echoed about my forest as the ivy dragged the hikers towards the darkness of my trees. The mortals tore at the thorny shackles at their feet, only bathing my ever tightening vines in blood. It was glorious; the birds screeched chants of victory and the earth rumbled my ancient name.
And in my moment of glory, I failed to take note of the girl as she wrenched something from her pocket and thrust it into the thick of my ivy. It was a cigarette lighter. A small click sounded, and within moments my plants were writhing in flame. She managed to claw herself off my scorched greenery, and began to rip apart the vines that held down her lover. Before I could react, he too was released from my grasp.
The humans clambered into a sprint, each screaming at the other to keep moving. Haley stole a look where the tables of food had once been, now seeing nothing but soil and ash.
My forest beasts roared, and my trees tore at the wind with their mighty branches. As the humans ripped through the brush, I hurled my ivy at them and it sharpened to form one screeching blade. Ravens flew from the trees and sliced the breeze as they chased in pursuit. My minions streaked across the meadow air, shooting towards the humans at a blinding speed. The ivy began to reach towards their ankles once more, nearly encasing their flesh when --
They burst out of my thick bushes and rolled onto the oily pavement of a highway rest stop. I glared at them through the trees as they gasped for breath; I burned with hatred as crimson as my blood-soaked leaves.
The once-roaring wind began to calm; my emerald-leaved trees settled into their natural place and the ravens receded from the sky. I return now to my slumber, temporarily free from the insolence of humanity. And one day very soon, when humans tread once more into my domain of green, I will awake.
I spied on the hikers for quite some time, from the trees along the highway as my ravens flew overhead. I watched when the rack atop their glimmering new vehicle broke loose, causing a good portion of their supplies and food to fly into oblivion. The two set up camp in my woods, and began to thoroughly enjoy themselves, littering my soil with grimy plastics and smoldering cigarette ends. I glowered from the bushes as their tent came crumbling down in the middle of the night, forcing the two lovebirds to sleep in the great outdoors with sticks in their backs and a chill in their bones. And finally, I followed them as they took a romantic nighttime stroll in my murky coastal woods. To their horror (and to my absolute delight), Haley and Josh became hopelessly, unmistakably lost.
But such minor setbacks should never hold back a truly motivated hiker. The two of them powered on through my thorny brush, piercing winds and angular, slicing branches. And with each self-assured step the clueless lovers took, they strayed further, and further still, from the safety of their sad little campsite.
* * * * *
The scent of perfectly crisped pheasant and cloud-like lemon cakes wafted throughout the heavy trees, twisting and turning amidst the forest air until it reached the noses of Haley and Josh. “I can smell food!” shrieked Haley, grasping at her partner's arm.
“Oh my god that's awesome!” Josh shouted, already stumbling towards the origin of the entrancing smell, which had now morphed into that of freshly cut bread and warm spiced wine. “We must be near another campsite!”
And just as a fly is attracted to molten gold honey, Josh and Haley crashed through my trees, headed right for my trap.
The two humans broke through the branches into a clearing, their clothes a shredded, muddy mess. Their hungry eyes gaped at the scene before them. Atop the flowering grass lay a feast; tables strewn across the glade, packed to the brim with exotic meats and pastries; glasses of bubbling champagne glinted in the sunlight and decadent cakes beckoned, drizzled in chocolate and caramel sauces.
The gluttonous mortals threw aside their belongings and flew towards the food, shoveling their faces with one magnificent mouthful after another.
And as they gorged themselves on duck fat dumplings and guzzled down foaming ales, Josh and Haley’s doom crept ever so quietly closer. Ivy tendrils slithered their way along the grass, curling itself around their filthy boots. The more the humans ate, the stronger the vines grew. Thorns blossomed from the slimy leaves as the ivy spiraled its way up their ankles.
And just as the two of them reached for a golden raspberry pie, my vines heaved. Human screams echoed about my forest as the ivy dragged the hikers towards the darkness of my trees. The mortals tore at the thorny shackles at their feet, only bathing my ever tightening vines in blood. It was glorious; the birds screeched chants of victory and the earth rumbled my ancient name.
And in my moment of glory, I failed to take note of the girl as she wrenched something from her pocket and thrust it into the thick of my ivy. It was a cigarette lighter. A small click sounded, and within moments my plants were writhing in flame. She managed to claw herself off my scorched greenery, and began to rip apart the vines that held down her lover. Before I could react, he too was released from my grasp.
The humans clambered into a sprint, each screaming at the other to keep moving. Haley stole a look where the tables of food had once been, now seeing nothing but soil and ash.
My forest beasts roared, and my trees tore at the wind with their mighty branches. As the humans ripped through the brush, I hurled my ivy at them and it sharpened to form one screeching blade. Ravens flew from the trees and sliced the breeze as they chased in pursuit. My minions streaked across the meadow air, shooting towards the humans at a blinding speed. The ivy began to reach towards their ankles once more, nearly encasing their flesh when --
They burst out of my thick bushes and rolled onto the oily pavement of a highway rest stop. I glared at them through the trees as they gasped for breath; I burned with hatred as crimson as my blood-soaked leaves.
The once-roaring wind began to calm; my emerald-leaved trees settled into their natural place and the ravens receded from the sky. I return now to my slumber, temporarily free from the insolence of humanity. And one day very soon, when humans tread once more into my domain of green, I will awake.